In response to comments posted yesterday in chronological order:
Re: my mama, I lead a very boring life.
Re: my brother and a column, how does one get into something like that is what I would really really like to know, because believe me, if I could do that I would.
Re: Kelly, we’re discussing Jimmy Buffett, whom we see in Chicago every year, but usually in Tinley Park where tickets are half as much, you can camp, etc. V. disappointing this year.
Now I shall finish my list and try not to let my anger at the guy I just spoke to from my bank who tells me the information I was given yesterday regarding a deposit was “partly true and not very accurate” overwhelm me. So then why would I be told something partly true and not accurate to begin with?! Who are these people?!
52. I really don’t like art museums all that much because I have no training (and no desire to be trained) about good or bad art. I think its all subjective and most of what I see I don’t care for.
53. I would like to work at the library and make people whisper….tee hee.
54. My favorite ice creams are Ben and Jerry’s Everything But…Coffee Toffee Bar Crunch and Peanut Butter Cup.
55. My favorite thing in the world to eat is an at home grilled cheeseburger with Suddenly Salad’s caesar pasta salad.
56. I really think I would like to withdraw all my (ha ha, its so much) my money from the bank, scream at someone until I am removed by security, and go back to stuffing it under my mattress.
57. I have pieces of my Grandma Dorothy in me and wish we (friends and family) all lived on the same block and that neighborhoods still had block parties. I wish I knew the other mom’s in this neighborhood and we could get together sometimes.
58. I would also love to have the ability to talk to animals rather than see the future, as I believe the future is sometimes unchangeable (paradox paradox!) and that things happen for a reason. I also think that if you could time travel or change the future that you would leave an imprint (time travel) or be tempted to change something you foresaw and that the effect on thousands of other lives would be tremendous (in either a bad or good way, I don’t know).
59. I would like another dog to keep my little man dog company and to make him act less like a cat.
60. I lived in a very old house with my two bestest pals, Erin and Sara, and we had many many parties. I don’t understand how the fuzz never showed up.
61. While living in that house we had a crazy neighbor named Bruce. Bruce once was tip-toeing around at two in the morning and delighting party-goers by chanting “I can walk on snow! I can walk on snow!” He then began leaving cryptic notes on peoples’ cars. He then began coming into our house when we were at work (all second shifters then) and cleaning out our ash trays. He then left a ream-sized lot of paper on my bed that he called his novel but was full of weird drawings and equally cryptic paragraphs. Then his wife threw him out.
62. I have never done drugs, I tried to smoke pot once or twice but always got sick and have had no interest ever since.
63. I love to drive down to the water (lake or bay) and watch a thunderstorm come in, this is especially cool in Grand Haven because the lake gets far angrier than the bay up here.
64. I like to fantasize that in another life I was a ladies maid or something and that is where my service oriented mind comes from (plus I think it would have been really cool!).
65. I also like to fantasize that are alterior universes that run parallel to this one. That all. the people I know may exist in one of these other universes but lives and family ties are completely different because they followed a different path. Its kinda like those books I used to read where you got to choose where to read next i.e. “if you think Nancy goes up the staircase turn to page 46, if you think she stayed to wait for her friends turn to page 60”. When I see a car like one someone I know or I used to drive, but can’t see the driver, I like to imagine that these are little blips in time, little tears in the fabric that seperates the parallel universes. Weird, huh?
66. I do not see anything red-neck about standing bare foot in your own front yard with a baby on your hip.
67. Speaking of barefoot, my feet, to the untrained eye, are gross. But I am proud of them, they are like hobbit feet, and I can walk just about anywhere bare foot without flinching.
68. Call me lazy but I hate walking on the unpacked beach, its too much work and if its hot enough to go to the beach (and it has to be pretty warm up here because the water hardly ever gets above 70 degrees), it is too hot to risk heat exhaustion.
69. I am afraid to ride a bike because what if I fall? I didn’t used to be this way.
70. I believe in ghosts from a purely sci-fi stand point. What happens to all that energy when someone dies?
71. I sometimes wish I lived in a time where it was still safe for four year olds to play outside in the front yard alone. Where women wore dresses and heels and gloves and hats. Don’t get me wrong, I’m for womens’ rights too, equal pay and opportunity and all that, but don’t you think the essence and divinty of being female has been lost in a closet full of trouser socks and pant suits? Don’t you think the whole point of that is to choose to be the woman at home wearing a dress and going calling on neighborhood women, fixing a drink before the guy gets home from work? What is so wrong with that?
72. I have had four heart surgeries (mom, correct me if I’m wrong), I think I have had two catheterizations, one angioplasty and the final one was a co-arctation of my aortic valve. The whole problem was a piece of that valve being too small to let an adequate blood supply through. But I’m okay now, just could contract a blood borne disease more easy that other people.
73. I used to play the flute and alto sax (just for a semester), I also tried the piccolo. What I really wanted to play was trumpet but they told me my emboucher was too soft.
74. I do indeed have many stories that invariably begin with the phrase, “this one time, at band camp” because I have been to band camp and its HARD work. For the record, I have NEVER done anything weirder than smack someone with my flute.
75. I one time had my bedroom door removed from its hinges for slamming it too many times. I one time had the light bulbs removed from the ceiling for leaving my bedroom light on all day. Creative punishments!
76. I still love to slam a door when I’m mad. Casey hates this.
77. I one time (and I feel enough time has passed to mention this) threw a full beer bottle at Casey. And I nailed him on the back of the head from at least ten yards off, in the dark. I am not proud of this.
78. My nails and my hair grow really fast. A curse and a blessing.
79. AHHH, final fact…..Jared nailed my other dream, to be able to put together a book someday using the bits and pieces and otherwise useless observations that run through my head on a daily basis.